Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
