Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
