i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
