Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize