that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
