Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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