Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
this just has baby written all over it
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
