what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
