Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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