I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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