Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
