Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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