You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize