come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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