i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
