mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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