just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
