Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
