yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
