The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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