My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
