My room smells like vodka and shame
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
