he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
