Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
