handjob tips. give me some.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
