since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
