I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
