I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
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