Whod you bang
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I wish my penis had an off switch
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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