I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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