I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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