it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
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