worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
false alarm, still single
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