so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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