Your dad touched me again.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
