Your face is a jimmy john
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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