He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
