oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
