dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
