I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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