nut hugger
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
