Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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