i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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