I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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