why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I just had sex on a roof
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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