She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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