my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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