I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
