11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
