i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
